"Speaking the truth in Love" is one of the most complicated and convoluted statements that has come out of evangelical Christianity in the last 20 years. If you have ever been told by someone that they are just “speaking the truth in love,” you have probably questioned whether or not they were actually speaking in love, or even telling the truth, for that matter. “Speaking the truth in love” has become a cover for Christians seeking to push their thoughts and opinions onto others while claiming “respectable” and “loving” motivations.
According to author Jared Byas, Christians have “argued, debated, and fought one another for years while ‘speaking the truth in love’ yet are no closer to the grace-filled life Jesus modeled.” In his new book, Love Matters More, Jared talks about how fighting to be right keeps us from loving like Jesus and makes the case that being right is less important than being in loving, authentic relationships with others—something that’s hard to do when we’re concerned about being “right.”
In the podcast interview, we talk about theological trauma, why truth is a poor guide to love, and why if it does not set you free--it isn't truth. And, while “Speaking the truth” in love is often a phrase conservative or evangelical Christians like to use, we discuss whether or not progressive Christians have their own version of this phrase as they seek to be right above relationships.
Jared Byas is cohost of the popular podcast The Bible for Normal People and coauthor of the book Genesis for Normal People. He is a former teaching pastor and professor of philosophy and biblical studies, Jared lives with his wife, Sarah, outside of Philadelphia, PA, with their four children.
If you have ever found yourself on the receiving end of those words, just being told from someone that they are “speaking the truth in love,” or if you’ve ever found yourself using those words in a conversation with a fellow follower of Jesus, listen in and find out what love matters more.